Questions

Readers are invited to submit light-hearted questions
and answers for consideration. Suggestions are subject
to modification or editing prior to publication. No
attribution will be included.

What is this asinine program? A corporation can’t be the president!
It might be illogical but the Supreme Court said in the Citizen’s United decision that corporations are persons. And our Constitution says that, subject to certain conditions, a person can be president.

Is General Electric actually a candidate for President?
No declaration has been made to date. Our self-appointed campaign staff waits with great anticipation for an announcement. Meanwhile, the campaign treasury has more than doubled in the past six months and now totals $3.93. There is no word yet from the Koch brothers.

What is the gender of General Electric?
There is some disagreement about the General’s gender. If you can’t avoid the issue, it may be best to consider the General as an android and use the term “it”.

What salutation should I use in a letter to General Electric?
Obviously, it would be inappropriate to use Mr., Mrs., Miss or It as a salutation. It would be best to use the General’s full name, e.g., “Dear General Electric.” If you are a close friend, it would also be appropriate to use the more intimate phrase, “Dear General.” When elected, the formal salutation would necessarily change to “Dear President General Electric.”

Why have I never seen a campaign portrait of General Electric?
The General values it’s privacy and no photograph has been made available.

Does the General plan to attend the national nominating convention?
Again, privacy is an issue. The General might possibly be represented by it’s CEO.

So what does the membership certificate look like?
Please click here to see the certificate reflecting the interest of our members in the personhood and presidential eligibility of GE.

Since GE is a person, who were his/her parents?
Thomas Edison might possibly be credited with fathering GE but there is no record of maternal involvement.

What are the details of GE’s birth?
GE was “born” by incorporation in New York State in 1892. Birth certificates are not required to be filed for Corporate persons so there is no record of the hospital, attending physicians, or family connections. Articles of Incorporation exist attesting to the birth and might satisfy the courts but probably not some of GE’s opponents in the race for presidential nomination.

At 123 years of age isn’t GE too old to be the president?
If asked, GE might reasonably echo Ronald Reagan who, during the 1984 presidential debates, said “I will not make age an issue of this campaign. I am not going to exploit, for political purposes, my opponent’s youth and inexperience.”

Is GE a Republican, Democrat, Independent, or Third Party person?
The simple answer is “yes, one of those.” But more telling might be that my friend Ronald Reagan was a Democrat when he became GE’s Good Will Ambassador in 1954 but switched to the Republican party in 1962!

Sounds militaristic; do we really need a General in charge?
Generals don’t always campaign for boots on the ground. Twelve previous presidents were generals and served with varying success as president: George Washington. Andrew Jackson, William Henry Harrison, Zachary Taylor, Franklin Pierce, Andrew Johnson, Ulyses S. Grant, Rutherford B. Hayes, James Garfield, Chester A. Arthur, Benjamin Harrison, and Dwight D. Eisenhower.